"I'LL NEVER FORGET."
RUMINATING
With a Ruminating Inner Critic, you tend to be very fixated on the past...
Maybe you regret a big mistake you made when you were younger, and are determined not to repeat it. You often reflect on what you could have done differently so you can be in a different place in life.
And when things are going well, you find yourself waiting for the other shoe to drop.
On the other hand, others can rely on you to keep your word — because you’ll do it, even when it's painful. Your dependability is a strong character trait.
Many people don’t take the time to assess why something didn’t go their way- you, however, have great potential to learn from the past and harness it to get what you want out of life, as long as you learn and move forward with it without fixating and stagnating in it.
You have an Ruminating Inner Critic if:
- You tend to project your worst thoughts about yourself onto others, not realizing that they actually aren’t giving your “failures” a second thought.
- You perpetuate failures and negativity by dwelling in them, and let the past creep into present and future decisions and circumstances.
- Your negative self-talk reduces your self-esteem
- You spend a lot of time wishing you had done or said something differently.
- You over-analyze situations, conversations, and actions, and feel self-conscious about them. Second guessing yourself so often means you suffer from a lack of self-confidence and may have trouble being decisive.
You’re here to learn: The past may inform your future choices, but it does not determine your future fate. It is not set in stone, and you can control the outcome of your future by learning from, not fixating or repeating, the past.
What happens when you bring 100% of yourself to the world: What would be possible for you if you were able to reclaim all the energy you've been investing into fondling old grudges and grievances, and bring yourself fully into the powerful NOW?
What would it feel like if you could consistently have experiences and glean wisdom and clarity from them, then move on instead of processing and fixating on them, imagining what you could have done differently?
How free would you feel if you were able to feel fully present and in the flow from moment-to-moment, instead of dwelling in some scenario that no longer exists anywhere but in your mind?
When you stop limiting your now by fixating on the past, you'll find a vast reservoir of energy within you unlocks and you become able to see two things: how worthy you are of your best life and how capable you are of living it starting right now.
Your Inner Critic says: “You’ve burnt that bridge. You’ve made your bed. You can’t come back from the mistakes you’ve made.”
Your Wise Inner Being Says: “All those ‘mistakes’ weren’t as consequential to others as they were internally to you. In fact, they can be beneficial: they are building blocks that help you learn and grow.”
Your Sacred Contract: The Universe provides us with everything we need to learn, grow, and manifest our true selves. Let your experiences be building blocks and knowledge gifts from the Universe. Once you change your paradigm, and see every experience as another universal element to reaching your true inner potential, you will not have to dwell. You will not have to regret. You will not have to simmer in what you considered ‘mistakes.’ There are none. There are only growing experiences.
What would it feel like if you could consistently have experiences and glean wisdom and clarity from them, then move on instead of processing and fixating on them, imagining what you could have done differently?
How free would you feel if you were able to feel fully present and in the flow from moment-to-moment, instead of dwelling in some scenario that no longer exists anywhere but in your mind?
When you stop limiting your now by fixating on the past, you'll find a vast reservoir of energy within you unlocks and you become able to see two things: how worthy you are of your best life and how capable you are of living it starting right now.
Your Inner Critic says: “You’ve burnt that bridge. You’ve made your bed. You can’t come back from the mistakes you’ve made.”
Your Wise Inner Being Says: “All those ‘mistakes’ weren’t as consequential to others as they were internally to you. In fact, they can be beneficial: they are building blocks that help you learn and grow.”
Your Sacred Contract: The Universe provides us with everything we need to learn, grow, and manifest our true selves. Let your experiences be building blocks and knowledge gifts from the Universe. Once you change your paradigm, and see every experience as another universal element to reaching your true inner potential, you will not have to dwell. You will not have to regret. You will not have to simmer in what you considered ‘mistakes.’ There are none. There are only growing experiences.
Things your Inner Critic says:
“You made your bed, now lie in it.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t speak up. Ugh.”
“You should have said/done it THIS way.”
“You are from the wrong family to be able to have that kind of life.”
“Why does this always happen to me?”
“They’re not going to let this go. I’m never going to get another chance.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t speak up. Ugh.”
“You should have said/done it THIS way.”
“You are from the wrong family to be able to have that kind of life.”
“Why does this always happen to me?”
“They’re not going to let this go. I’m never going to get another chance.”
Gifts:
- Focused
- Great capacity for growth
- Thoughtful
- Deliberate
Challenges:
- Not spontaneous
- Regretful
- Worry
- Anxiety
KEYWORDS
Awaken To: Fixating Obsessing Second Guessing
Align To: Lessons Forward Momentum Future
Your Ruminating Inner Critic may show itself most clearly in these areas of your life:
Family & Childhood: You often think you’re hearing your mother or father's voice in the form of your own thoughts. As a child, you often wished life would speed up and you could be an adult. Now that you are an adult, you’re stuck rehashing the events that happened when you were a child and re-creating the unhappy energies. You might have grown up with a parent or someone else you looked up to who never let you forget your so-called mistakes, flaws, failures or shortcomings.
Love & Relationships: Because you tend to focus on the past, you hold grudges and grievances, with others — and with God, life, and especially yourself. You recreate this same relational template over and over again, usually without realizing it. When you’re upset or stressed, you need to talk about your struggles and process sometimes with many people… often for many days. Friends and family may tell you you need to ‘move on’ or ‘let it go’ when you repeatedly bring up something that happened.
You struggle to have real time honest conversations with those close to you, for fear of hurting them or saying the wrong thing- but in the end it hurts you more because you aren’t expressing your needs, and you are internalizing regrets.
Work & Money: You spend a lot of time thinking about past conversations you’ve had or decisions you’ve made, and how things could’ve played out differently. You may freeze up in the moment, unable to speak your truth or say what you really wish to say; almost as though you are caught off guard by your own feelings about an issue. Later you will replay that conversation, and fixate on what you wish you had said.
Resentments towards coworkers or superiors may build because you struggle to voice your real opinion and thoughts, so you get ‘stuck’ in a conversation or event that was unpleasant to you. The other party may have no idea why you feel that way, or even that you do.
Creativity, Passion & Purpose: You have trouble expressing yourself, taking risks and making choices — you often feel like you're in a holding pattern, waiting for life to begin. You’re also frequently intimidated by other people in your peer set. At the same time, you fear that if you truly lived up to your potential you might outshine someone you care about — living or dead.
Love & Relationships: Because you tend to focus on the past, you hold grudges and grievances, with others — and with God, life, and especially yourself. You recreate this same relational template over and over again, usually without realizing it. When you’re upset or stressed, you need to talk about your struggles and process sometimes with many people… often for many days. Friends and family may tell you you need to ‘move on’ or ‘let it go’ when you repeatedly bring up something that happened.
You struggle to have real time honest conversations with those close to you, for fear of hurting them or saying the wrong thing- but in the end it hurts you more because you aren’t expressing your needs, and you are internalizing regrets.
Work & Money: You spend a lot of time thinking about past conversations you’ve had or decisions you’ve made, and how things could’ve played out differently. You may freeze up in the moment, unable to speak your truth or say what you really wish to say; almost as though you are caught off guard by your own feelings about an issue. Later you will replay that conversation, and fixate on what you wish you had said.
Resentments towards coworkers or superiors may build because you struggle to voice your real opinion and thoughts, so you get ‘stuck’ in a conversation or event that was unpleasant to you. The other party may have no idea why you feel that way, or even that you do.
Creativity, Passion & Purpose: You have trouble expressing yourself, taking risks and making choices — you often feel like you're in a holding pattern, waiting for life to begin. You’re also frequently intimidated by other people in your peer set. At the same time, you fear that if you truly lived up to your potential you might outshine someone you care about — living or dead.
Your Liberation Declaration (Mantra):
Speak your Mind. Know your Truth. Apply your Knowledge. Create Your Success, Happiness, and Joy.
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