"I MAKE CALM OUT OF CHAOS."
CONTROLLING - PREDICTING
Your Controlling-Predicting Inner Critic keeps you focused on catastrophic thinking and keeps you depleted by scurrying around, fixing other people’s problems. This distracts you from your own callings.
You’re an amazing person to have around in a pinch — you’re an expert troubleshooter. You know how to make rock-solid plans and people feel secure around you, because you’ve got this. You have a very low tolerance for risk and uncertainty, and will do anything to stop feeling untethered from a firm plan.
The challenge is that life almost never plays out that way, so you spend a lot of your time either frozen in analysis paralysis, worrying about things that will never happen or feeling untethered when life doesn't play out according to plan. You constantly write (and rewrite!) long to-do lists and action plans so you feel ready for anything.
Being prepared for anything also means your attention is often focused on how things can go wrong. Worst-case scenarios are always playing out in your mind…
Because of this, it can impede your progress. You may have an idea, start making plans, but then become overcome with analysis paralysis. Worry and overthinking keep you from making decisions, because you are searching for the risk-free choice; but so often there isn’t one, so it keeps you from actually moving forward.
You may have a Controlling-Predicting Critic if:
- You believe entrepreneurship is a huge risk, and are hesitant to take the leap.
- Any time you start to pour effort into something you talk yourself out of it, because you’re sure it will be criticized for not being good enough.
- You can strategize and plan best, but when it comes to doing, it can be hard to commit to an action.
- Your strength is in seeing the big picture. While you might get caught up in doubt while executing, you are excellent at finding roadblocks and planning ways to avoid them. This is instrumental to operating your own business.
- You plan for the worst… and expect the worst.
- Analysis paralysis can stop you from taking action. You live in fear that you might do the wrong thing.
You’re here to learn: You can trust that everything is always working out for you, even when things don’t go according to plan.
What happens when you bring 100% of yourself to the world: Breakthroughs await when you stop overthinking things, stop squeezing all the juice, electricity, and joy out of your dreams and just take daily imperfect action steps closer to your best life.
Your Inner Critic says “NEVER let them see you sweat. Uncertainty is intolerable. You already have a great life. You’re tempting fate to try to change. You’d better get in gear or very bad things will happen.”
Your Wise Inner Being Says: “Almost nothing you worry about actually happens. Turn your fear into exhilaration at the prospect of your own expansion by engaging wholeheartedly with whatever is making you afraid.”
Your Sacred Contract: If you let them, the best things in life will flow to you in surprising, wonderful, delightful ways…and not through hard effort, and overcontrolling your own destiny. Think to yourself “what is the worst that can happen?” Oftentimes, it’s not that bad. So use your risk assessment abilities to decide to act more often by taking low risk actions at first.
What happens when you bring 100% of yourself to the world: Breakthroughs await when you stop overthinking things, stop squeezing all the juice, electricity, and joy out of your dreams and just take daily imperfect action steps closer to your best life.
Your Inner Critic says “NEVER let them see you sweat. Uncertainty is intolerable. You already have a great life. You’re tempting fate to try to change. You’d better get in gear or very bad things will happen.”
Your Wise Inner Being Says: “Almost nothing you worry about actually happens. Turn your fear into exhilaration at the prospect of your own expansion by engaging wholeheartedly with whatever is making you afraid.”
Your Sacred Contract: If you let them, the best things in life will flow to you in surprising, wonderful, delightful ways…and not through hard effort, and overcontrolling your own destiny. Think to yourself “what is the worst that can happen?” Oftentimes, it’s not that bad. So use your risk assessment abilities to decide to act more often by taking low risk actions at first.
Things your Inner Critic says:
“You can’t do that! Way too risky.”
“NEVER let them see you sweat”
“Uncertainty is intolerable.”
“If you go off plan, you’ll wind up on the streets.”
“You already have a great life. You’re tempting fate to try to change.”
“You’d better get in gear or Very Bad Things will happen”
Gifts:
- A-list polish, aesthetics
- Leadership quality
- Work is trusted and respected
- You create beautiful things
- Always stand out above the rest
Challenges:
- High tolerance for shadow jobs, relationships
- Refusal to try new things, be imperfect
- Others may find you cold or calculating
- Status- and approval-seeking
- Perfectionism causes procrastination
KEYWORDS
Awaken To: Analysis Paralysis Perfectionism Inaction
Align To: Trust Surrender Forward Momentum
Your Controlling-Predicting Inner Critic may show itself most clearly in these areas of your life:
Family & Childhood: According to your family of origin, the worst thing ever was to be poor or to have lost everything. Your parents often discussed other people’s catastrophes and misfortunes, pointing out how they could have avoided them if they were smarter or more responsible. Meanwhile, your primary caregiver as a child was emotionally unpredictable.
As a child, you were good at a lot of things right out of the gate. You were rewarded for A+ grades, were valedictorian, or had first chair in the orchestra. You can almost feel the dopamine hits you’ve gotten from the external approval of others over your lifetime… as a kid, in college, in your early twenties and even now.
So, over time, you came to believe that your work is who you are, and its perfection is the measure of your worth.
But you may not have received much attention, assistance, or approval during the learning process itself, so you don’t have a ton of tolerance for the messy middle of things.
Love & Relationships: While your loved ones consider you a worrier, they love how you create calm from chaos. Unfortunately, your permeable boundaries often mean you fall into patterns of chronic over-caretaking in your relationships. This cycle is always in progress as you (unknowingly) train people to overly rely on you. You may attract those that are always experiencing drama or catastrophes. You play the ‘helper or ‘fixer’ role to them. And it feels good.
Work & Money: You stand out at work because you’re so skilled at minimizing risks and avoiding problems. Yet, you often stop yourself from voicing your creative, inspired, out-of-the-box ideas in meetings — you wouldn’t want to look stupid in front of everyone. You often think of all the bad things that could happen, and believe that getting publicly criticized, reprimanded, laid off, or fired would be one of the worst things that could happen in life. You’d love to shake things up and do something with your life that feels more authentic to the soulful being you really are inside, but the idea of leaving your title and status feels catastrophic.
Creativity, Passion & Purpose: You like to think through all the ways people might criticize or judge you before you put something out into the world. For instance, you could never write a memoir without being anxious about what the people in your life might think. Part of you believes that if you truly lived up to your true potential and pursued your passions, you might end up alone. But you feel powerful, needed, and loved when you ‘help’ someone avoid the natural, disastrous consequences of their own behavior (aka Superhero Syndrome). This isn’t great, as it cripples them and magnetizes other people who need “fixing” into your world.
As a child, you were good at a lot of things right out of the gate. You were rewarded for A+ grades, were valedictorian, or had first chair in the orchestra. You can almost feel the dopamine hits you’ve gotten from the external approval of others over your lifetime… as a kid, in college, in your early twenties and even now.
So, over time, you came to believe that your work is who you are, and its perfection is the measure of your worth.
But you may not have received much attention, assistance, or approval during the learning process itself, so you don’t have a ton of tolerance for the messy middle of things.
Love & Relationships: While your loved ones consider you a worrier, they love how you create calm from chaos. Unfortunately, your permeable boundaries often mean you fall into patterns of chronic over-caretaking in your relationships. This cycle is always in progress as you (unknowingly) train people to overly rely on you. You may attract those that are always experiencing drama or catastrophes. You play the ‘helper or ‘fixer’ role to them. And it feels good.
Work & Money: You stand out at work because you’re so skilled at minimizing risks and avoiding problems. Yet, you often stop yourself from voicing your creative, inspired, out-of-the-box ideas in meetings — you wouldn’t want to look stupid in front of everyone. You often think of all the bad things that could happen, and believe that getting publicly criticized, reprimanded, laid off, or fired would be one of the worst things that could happen in life. You’d love to shake things up and do something with your life that feels more authentic to the soulful being you really are inside, but the idea of leaving your title and status feels catastrophic.
Creativity, Passion & Purpose: You like to think through all the ways people might criticize or judge you before you put something out into the world. For instance, you could never write a memoir without being anxious about what the people in your life might think. Part of you believes that if you truly lived up to your true potential and pursued your passions, you might end up alone. But you feel powerful, needed, and loved when you ‘help’ someone avoid the natural, disastrous consequences of their own behavior (aka Superhero Syndrome). This isn’t great, as it cripples them and magnetizes other people who need “fixing” into your world.
Your Liberation Declaration (Mantra):
Everything is always working out for me.
This quiz is brought to you by
©SoulTour PBC and Tara-Nicholle Kirke | Terms and Conditions
Inner Critic Cure © Heart of Success, Inc. This website © SoulTour PBC and Tara-Nicholle Kirke
Spiritual Strategy and Spiritual Strategy Session are trademarks of SoulTour, PBC and Tara-Nicholle Kirke, registration pending